Our congregation has committed to engage in workshops once a month that help us think about the ways to be a healthy church that is for proclaiming the love of Jesus to all the world.  At workshop #1, we learned about making "I statements", about how congregations are connected in emotional systems, how we affect one another, and how anxiety is spread throughout the system.  

Bible
Two Hours of Time
​White Board/Chart Paper and Markers
Jump Ropes
Hula Hoops
Marbles
Pool Ring
Creating a Healthier Church by Ronald W. Richardson, Ch. 4-6

​Everyone chose a marble from a container, and then we went around the circle of 12 people.  Each person shared how they thought that marble represented them.  We found out that everyone used different words to describe their marbles, even when they appeared the same way to the eye.  Words like: maybe some will think this is ugly, but I think it’s beautiful, pretty, pitted, different, sparkly, textured, interesting, iridescent, see-through, gold, yellow, clear, opaque.  This became a helpful discussion about perception, and the multiple ways one might describe the same thing.  

We worked with Acts 4:32-5:11 and noticed some things about the text.  We noticed that God doesn’t kill Ananias, but that he just falls dead.  Maybe from grief?  Maybe from shame?  How does it hurt us when we can’t live in community well?  Does living in community mean giving up everything we have?  We didn’t have any good answers; however, it was interesting to sit with a group of congregation members and interrogate a Bible story about togetherness and separation.  If nothing else, this story highlights how hard it is to live in community, and gives us motivation for learning to do it well.
As people said what they noticed about the story, their answers were: fell down and died, great fear, none had any need, alarmed, power, lied to God, [guilt/shame/shock]

​Four volunteers demonstrated the close/distant dynamic with jump ropes.  They also included the pursuer/distancer dynamic.  People tried to put others closer, while others tried to pull away.  For example, see below:
One:
A: Oh my gosh, I haven’t seen you in a week, how are you?  When we can get together?
B: Ummm, I’m not sure.  I’ve been really busy lately.
A: Let’s have dinner tonight!
B:  I can’t, I have family coming over.
A: How about Monday? Or Tuesday?
B: [Drops her end of jump rope and leaves conversation.]
Two:
A: Hey, welcome to our church!  I’m glad you came today. How are you?  Would you like to get together for dinner soon?
B:  I’m not ready for that, could we meet for coffee instead?
A: OK! 
[They stay connected by the rope, AND respected one another’s boundaries.]

Overview/Teaching on how we think for ourselves, how anxiety is spread around the system, how we use language. Discussion on being reflective, owning our own thoughts and feelings.  We covered feeling/thinking, being reactive/reflective, ownership of our thoughts and feelings, the concept of “you make me” v. “I feel/think when you ____________”, how we try to make ourselves more comfortable by sharing level of threat, ​not relying on other to “make you feel better.”

​First, we created a story about a power pole breaking from a lightning strike during Sunday School.  It crashes into our kid’s play area, putting a hole in the roof.  Water from the large rainstorm in pouring into our fellowship hall.   We practiced two different ways of spreading anxiety around, one that involved owning our own responsibility and worries, and one that did not. 
Everyone got into small groups of 2 or 3.  We had hula hoops of anxiety, and passed them around.  We blamed others for problems, complained, and handed hula hoops to our partners.  If Person A was the one sharing the hula hoop of anxiety, often Person B would respond with “When I hear you talk that way, I feel ______________.”  This resulted in only hurt feelings, anger, and very little problem solving. 
We also practiced putting hula hoops around ourselves and owning our own thoughts/feelings.  We practiced using “I statements”.  Everyone could name their own worry, and what they thought they could do to help with the situation.  Many ideas for problem solving were shared, and everyone felt better at the end. 
Discussion:  What is the role of feelings?  How does it help to give them the proper role? By using our feelings to let us know something isn’t ok, or something needs to be done, we can move to proactive goal-focused conversation.  It is not about not having feelings, it is about giving them their place in being an alert system, owning them, having them acknowledged, and then moving onto problem solving. 

In order to understand how we are each our separate selves while moving forward as a community, we collectively decided to talk about Christmas Eve.  There was an idea on the table that we would partner with another small nearby congregation.  We would do an earlier Interactive Children’s Service, and the other congregation would do a later Candlelight service.  We would advertise together, people could attend earlier service, and the Pastors would be at both services. Unbeknownst to me, the time of the Christmas Eve service was normally a conflictual conversation with high levels of threat and anxiety.

For this conversation, we had two minutes of silence while everyone started into their marbles and decided what they thought about this idea.  [add picture of chart paper where answers were recorded]
The pool ring was slid from the leader to the next person at the table.  That person said what they thought, placed their marble into the ring, and then slid with ring (taking the marble with it) to the next person at the table.  We went around the entire table, and people named their own self-interest.  They said parts of the idea they liked, where they might go for Christmas Eve, and the times of their personal family dinners. We learned that some people do not like the pews at the other congregation, and that some people might like to come to both services, but cannot drive after dark.  We learned that some people have felt hurt in the past when the service was scheduled at a time they could not attend – they felt left out of the community.
​
The second time around, everyone took a second marble.  This time, people said what they thought was right for the community.  The second time, after everyone had claimed their own ideas, everyone thought that the partnership was good for the community, as long as there was non-pew seating, and rides for after dark.  It was powerful to have each person talk twice, and to have people make a difference between their self-interest and the interest of the community.  It was the calmest conversation about Christmas Eve in years according to one participant.

​In closing, everyone said one word in reaction, and they we prayed together.  Words were:

• Hopeful
• Complicated
• Intrigued
• Feeling good about Calvary
• More Open
• More Communication
• Hopeful
• Gained Ground
• Happier

We all agreed at the end that we like our church, and are happy to be part of it! 

​Three weeks after this workshop, a council meeting was held.  It could have been a highly conflictual one.  A conflict between two council members was brought out during the meeting.  The conversation was intense; however, it is notable for what was absent and what was present. Absent was yelling, chair throwing, name calling, and personal attacks.  Present were “I statements”, clarification of ideas, clarification of communication, clarification of responsibilities going forward, and requests for things to be in writing.  This will eventually include job descriptions for each committee and council position so that everyone knows who is responsible for what, and whom reports to who.  This congregation, that has a history of avoiding conflict and walking on egg shells around those who are upset, solved a conflict with ownership, problem-solving, and clarification.  We not only tolerated the conflict, we moved forward to help prevent it from happening again!  The workshops are working.  Even though I wrote them, presented them, and taught them, I could not be sure that would work.  Good news, they are!!
 
P.S.  At least for now.  Systems often try hard to go back to the way things used to be, so we’ll see what the pushback is, and how that will be handled.  However, we are celebrating the great progress that we’ve made.  Also, if you’d like me (Pastor Jess) to come and do these workshops with your congregation or staff, you can contact me here.  

The Gospel of John Chapter 10 can be a rough chapter for Christians to read and understand.  I encourage you to read the whole chapter.  If you don't have a Bible (or don't want to find it), you can read the entire chapter by clicking the button below.
If there's not a Bible in your house, you can use the website Bible Gateway, and there are numerous apps for phones with Bibles.  I use Olive Tree.  For this article, I would like to invite us to focus on one verse. 

This article will be complicated and nuanced.  It will not contain an entire story, but it will contain things that our congregations can do in the future.  I invite you to keep an open mind while reading and to see how this might make a difference.  It would be normal for you to have feelings while reading this.  Notice them, share them with me or others, and let them pass so that we can be about creating a culture of abundant life in our churches. 
  
Change is hard for everyone, and for many, this is a significant culture change.  I imagine some of you will also feel joy and relief that we’re working so hard on our culture. Some of you may be excited about us bringing out topics that affect many of our everyday lives.  Maybe, for some, knowing that we’re creating a culture of safety in our communities that isn’t available in the world at large will bring great happiness.

Others of us might grieve the way that changes confuse us or don’t seem right to us and our view of the world.  Sometimes, they don’t seem to make sense with our own life experience.  I know that my church growing up was a safe place for me, and that I’ve had my image of church shattered as an adult when I realize that many churches never talked about consent culture.  I know that for some, we will need time to grieve what we thought church was, should be, or could be.  When our eyes are opened to new possibilities, sometimes it is exciting, and sometimes it can be hard. That’s ok, and it is ok be angry or frustrated if this is something that is hard to understand.  Faith matters to me in my everyday life.  Reading the Bible and learning to be the best possible Christian community we can be for the sake of Jesus matters to me.

There’s a campaign going on online right now called #metoo.  Women, femmes, and trans folks are posting stories of being harassed for being not strictly male. Some men are also posting their own stories of bodily harassment and assault. (If you have a trauma history, you are welcome to stop reading and talk to me.  I am 40 hour trained in the state of Illinois in both domestic violence and sexual assault survivor advocacy. You can contact me here.)  ​​

If you understand these things happen in churches, please read below to find out what you can do to help change the culture in congregations to make these things less possible.  Also, see the calls to action for at the end of this article.

If you think that these things are not happening in churches, please read an article by Rev. Chrien here.
Many people are posting stories about times they were harassed in the church.  If Jesus came to give us abundant life, then we need to have a congregational culture that doesn’t allow this kind of harassment to happen.  When one listens to the stories of the great pain of survivors, one hears that being touched without consent, having our bodies commented on, not being allowed to say no – all these things steal, kill and destroy dignity, humanity, and abundant life.  Some of you might be upset that I’m talking about sexual harassment, naming it out loud.  Some of you might think that survivors should just learn to live with this, or feeling like it is unfair that survivors today have rights that you wish you had, but might have not been able to experience.  (For example, it is still true that some people are fired when they refuse to let their boss grab their behind. It is also true that many women shared stories of this happening to them during the sharing of the peace or in the communion line, sometimes from when they were children.) 

To know why these stories matter and have so much power, please read this post by Vicar Alex Witt.  

We need our church to be a different place.  Jesus calls us to abundant life, and we often experience that in community.  If our job as disciples of Jesus is to offer people experiences of abundant life, then church needs to be countercultural.  Needs to be safe from physical danger. To be a place that honors the stories of those most harmed, and holds those doing the harming accountable.  This is not just about Calvary, this is about most churches.  We’ve not done a great job at this in the past. I’m finding that many people are confused about what consent culture means, and why it matters.  If you are confused and are willing to learn more, please ask me for articles.  Consent culture matters a great deal, and it is part of how we recognize the full humanity and bodily antonymy of others. 
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1. Waves are an option during the sharing of the peace. People are asked before given hugs or even handshakes in most cases. Our bulletin says this already, and I say this every time before we share the peace so that it can truly be peace that is shared. 
2. Children can have their own physical boundaries and have them honored, respected, and listened to.  Stories as well as research show us that being able to say “NO” to hugging an adult at the age of 2 makes it easier to understand that NO has power and protects children later in life.  Saying please and thank you are respectful and good manners, touching others when you do not want to is just harmful. 
3. Children need to be asked before being tickled or picked up. If they say “no” respect their no.  Adults will work together to hold one another accountable for this.
4. If someone touches you in ways that make you uncomfortable, or if someone is not respecting your no, let pastor know and a plan of action that keeps you safe will be worked out.
5. It is encouraged that people speak up about their own boundaries, and those boundaries will be respected.  For example, if someone says “I do not like being talked to that way” or “I do not talk to people who yell at me” or “I do not want to ever be alone with that person, will you stay with me?” those wishes will be respected and we will hold one another accountable for those things. 
6. Physical harm and fear is valued over hurt feelings, and people speak up when they need to. 

These things might be significant culture changes for many of you.  Some of us grew up in worlds where children were to hug adults as a sign of respect.  Where whatever adults said mattered the most, and not hurting their feelings mattered the most. 

I’m inviting all of us toadopt this consent culture in our congregations.  So that we can all have life, and have it abundantly, and be sure that no one from our congregation ever has to post #metoo about things that happen in our community.  Will you join me in working on practicing a consent culture?  Let the world know your congregation is a safe place (or, last least, is trying to be).    
 
I don’t have all the answers.  #metoo is triggering and huge emotional labor for many clergy people right now, especially those who are femme, woman, trans, gay, and non-binary.  Also, many people I know are living in trauma brain this week.  Sharing these stories has caused nightmares, PTSD symptoms, high levels of anxiety and so much more.  Let's make it all mean something and work for change.

​Let’s work together to have all these stories mean something and change the culture inside the church.  

One of the big things about Family Systems Theory, which I also preached about on Sunday morning, is that the system generally wants to stay stable.  So if the the system change (like from this workshop) threatens some people's place in the system, they will work hard to bring it back to the way it was.  

Perhaps they will do this by complaining to everyone except the Pastor about all that happened in church that day.  Perhaps they will see if others will still listen to their negative speaking.  

Hopefully, and this so far seemed to the be the case here, those desperate for a new way of doing church will have learned what they needed to learn  Hopefully, even if it is imperfect and timid, those people will be sure Pastor knows who is complaining about what.  Hopefully, Pastor is having a good day and is able to go directly to the people who complained, listen to them, and work with them to solve a problem of lack of education on a topic.  

Hopefully the system begins to change.  Be aware this can be a slow process, but so is all renewal work, and we trust that the Holy Spirit will guide us, and that this newfound knowledge will help us notice things and do things differently.  

With any renewal project, there are always both internal and external things that a church needs to work through.  Some self-reflection is always in order, but it can be hard, and sometimes threatening.  Sometimes, in a very small congregation, the church is the size of an extended family, and works like one. 

That's why people have put together this idea of Church Family Systems.  Understanding church as an emotional unit, and understanding how we impact one another with our words and actions.  This is new for many churches, and it is a new concept for mine.  Below, you can read about how we went about understanding this with our 1st of 4 workshops. The congregation ended up doing some really intense emotional work on themselves during the workshop, in amazing Holy Spirit led ways.  Also, because we were playing, there was laughter and fun the whole time.  

• Creating a Healthier Church by Ronald W. Richardson
• Hot Wheels Track Builder Straight Track and Connectors
• Hot Wheels Track Builder Curved Track and Connectors (Toy R' Us, Hot Wheels aisle)
• Hot Wheels Cars (one for each person, plus four extra) (In Chicago, any single car over $0.99 is too expensive.) 
• Hot Wheels Turbine Twister (Practice before the workshop, use for meditation after, or put it in your nursery.)
• White Board/ Wall Post-It Tabletop Tablet, Dry Erase Markers
• The Bible 

If you decide to do this, please comment below (with permission) a picture or screen shot of the reaction of your treasurer/reimbursement person when you submit receipts from Toys R Us as ministry expense.

In July and August, our congregation studied a Bible story together every week for six weeks.  You can read about that here. We started the workshop by reading Mark 4:35-41.  Then, we listed in two columns The Disciples and Jesus.  Under each heading, we listed together on the marker board things that each person (let's pretend the Disciples are one person for ease of writing, grammar, and because that's how the story is written) did, said, and may have felt.  We concentrated on action words at the beginning like "going across".  Then, we drew arrows from the Jesus column to the Disciples columns to talk about how their feelings and actions impacted each other and what each other did next.  We talked about the group as an emotional system, and how anxiety traveled from the storm (outside influence) to the disciples, to Jesus.  We noted that to survive a storm, Jesus must be in the center.  

I spontaneously prayed for our group, what we would learn, and thanksgivings based on the previous conversation.  If anyone needs me to script a prayer that might work, let me know in the comments and I'll add one.  

We read pages 13-19 of the book Creating Healthier Church.  I have reached out for copyright permission to post it here, but we'll see if I get it.  It is the story of two churches who both have broken boilers, and therefore no heat, on Sunday morning.  Because of the coldness, snow, and ice, several Sunday school teachers call in sick.  Finally, because the sewer drains back up with snow, the preschool at one church and the daycare at another are flooded on Sunday morning.  There are calls and conversations between the custodian, head of the property team, director of the preschool/daycare, pastor, and head of the Sunday School. 

In one church, each person owns their own feelings, and decides what they can do about it all.  At the end of the day, everyone likes being at that church, even though it was a wild morning.  

In the second church, each person blames someone else for the problems, people staring calling and gossiping, and lot of stress and anxiety gets passed around.  

We made a list of the differences between the churches.  

As feelings and stress get moved around our congregation, they are amplified and changed by the person listening.  Person B can change the course of the car, like the wheel.  The car would fall off the track if not for the wheel.  What kind of emotions do we want to send around our congregation?  How do we want to respond to things?  How do we take problems and feelings seriously, while amplifying joy and positivisty?  

Everyone has their own Hot Wheels car, and there is a pile of straight and curved track in the middle of the table.  People are paired off, and the pair each make some kind of track with at least two pieces connecting.  Laughter ensues.  Since each person also has their own car, the pairs practice sending the cars back and forth to one another for awhile.  Then, attention focused on a noticed reality.  We noticed that toys were left in the kid's toy area after all the kids and parents had left. We attempted to say it using only factual words, which turned out to be pretty difficult.  People tended to use value or blame words, and it took us awhile as a group to come up with a fact.  Any example will do here.  You may want to use something people complained about in a different congregation.         

Let's go back to using Person A and Person B.  Person A, the first person in the pair, says to Person B, the second person in the pair, "I can't believe how irresponsible parents these days are.  Back in my day I never let kids leave without cleaning up!  How could the kids not know?  Parents, Geesh!"  Person A sends his car to Person B while saying this, and then, as the leader, I ask Person B how he felt hearing that.  We did a little debriefing, and to send his car back, he decided to say "I'm disappointed you feel this way, I'm just glad kids are in the church."

We went around the room having Person A of the pair saying something to Person B, send them their car, and then having Person B send a car back with a new statement.  

We figured out that Jesus and his disciples, in the storm from Mark 4:35-41 were not in a totally healthy emotional system.  When the disciples say "Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?” they are almost blaming Jesus for the storm.  They are also making assumptions about him and his behavior.  We practiced what might be a healthier response of the Disciples.  Something like, "Jesus, wake up!  There's a storm, I'm scared we're going to die, can you help us?"  In that sentence, the Disciples own their own feelings, as opposed to before, when they assume Jesus doesn't care.  What else could the disciples have said?  Be sure to write that in the comments. 

As we wrapped up, I made an offhand comment about how I'd know the success or failure of the worship based on if the toys were cleaned up by time I was done packing up.  Person said that since we talked about all accepting responsibility for things, everyone should help.  They went and picked up the toys. 

AND THEN

White Lutherans helped pray out loud (this is foreign to most of us raised in white Lutheran churches).  I started each round, and for each sentence, we went around the table (you could say "pass") and everyone could contribute to the prayer. 

Dear Creator God, we thank you for your creation of Calvary and for all the work you are doing here.  We also thank you for . . . . . 
Dear Redeeming Jesus, we ask that you help us with . . . . . 
Dear Inspiring Spirit, we ask that you give us hope that . . . . . 
Thank you for hearing all these things, and also the silent prayers of our hearts.  Continue to be with us and help us to be a place that showers our entire neighborhood with your love and blessings. Amen.  

Each Sunday, as the Kids leave Kid's time, they walk around the congregation and hand out the pieces of notepaper. (We use Office Depot Twirl Memo Cube.) Everyone is invited to write one good thing about our congregation, or to write a compliment for someone else at church.  The kids often pick up these notes during the offering and bring them to box kept in the front.  Sometimes people put them in the box after worship.  Notes may be signed or unsigned.  Notes are published in our newsletter every month as they are written, unless the word "private" is written on it.  

Really well.  We get lots of compliments each Sunday, many of them including how much people enjoy having the kids around and how welcomed they feel.  The effect of this has been helpful so far.  First, when people complain about the kids, there's a written record that I'm not forcing the entire congregation to accept noise and chaos.  It shows that some people love it.  Second, instead of us complaining about how there's not enough people to do everything, we can see the names of the people who are doing things.  Third, it gives us a solid base of liking one another and liking the congregation to work from when there is conflict or when problems need to be solved.  We are also working really hard on direct conflict resolution and using "I statements"  Fourth, our "Suggestion and Comment" box has been reborn, so now there's nowhere for anonymous complaints to land.  This has brought

​First, let me say that I love this congregation, and I love being your Pastor.  I am so excited to see all the new ways we can do ministry together.  As part of our renewal efforts, this month I’m going to invite us into learning how to recognize bullies and how to hold them accountable, and how to stand up to them.  If we want to invite new people, especially children, into our place, we need to be sure that we are working on having a good culture that is full of emotional safety for everything. 

​Although learning a new way of doing things and culture change is hard, I know that we can do it for the sake of Jesus and for the sake of being a place where the Good News of Jesus is communicated to all those around us and all those who walk through our doors.  I also know that when we start talking about culture change some people think that they must leave.  Sometimes people can feel nervous or anxious, or try to control other things about the group when culture change happens.  If you are having a hard time with this, or thinking about this, or even talking about this kind of thing, please, please come and talk to me.  I’m always here for you to listen to your ideas and thoughts, and worries about what will happen with Calvary in the future.  I know from reading and studying other churches in renewal efforts that having open and honest conversation is important, and that so is culture change.

​Many of us were taught as children that to be Christian means to “be nice”.  In some churches, that has meant not challenging people who are constantly bringing negativity, speaking meanly to others, using overly harsh or intimidating words, or are looking to blame “out there” and “the secular” for what’s happening inside our churches.  I can’t do anything about out there, or parents these days.  All we can do together is create a culture of physical and emotional safety inside our doors, and invite people to come. This is a topic that is coming up in a lot of churches this September, so I’d like to invite us into the topic, too.  Remember, sometimes the best way to communicate the love of God is to help others understand when they are not communicating that way.  A community that is centered on Jesus can help us grow, forgive us when we mess up, and teach us to be in healthy relationships with one another.  Boundaries are loving, and they are nice, even if they can bring more challenges in the moment, in the long term, they bring about health and wholeness, along with honesty.  Will you please take a moment to read the outline I shared with council and work together with me on this culture change?  Thanks!  I know from both research, by Bible, and my heart, that learning healthy communication and how to have healthy conflict with boundaries around bullying are one of the best ways churches can grow.  Let me know how you’re doing with this.  Let’s all keep working together as the community of love that God has created us to be.  Thanks for being in this ministry with me! 
 
School is starting and lot is coming out about bullying culture.  It hurts people, can sometimes lead to death and mental illness, and leave permanent trauma scars in people’s brains and bodies. 
Bullying

1. We need to learn how to recognize bullying behavior and how to stand up to bullies. 
2. If kids are experiencing bullies in school, we need to be sure that we, as the adults at church, are aware of how to stand up for ourselves and how to teach them.  We also need to be sure that our church is a bully free zone. 
3. Whenever you hear someone say something in church that might be bullying, these things might happen
   1. You might feel a little funny flutter in your stomach.
   2. You might feel your cheeks turn red.
   3. You might feel warmer.
   4. You heart rate might slighting increase.
4. We are often taught to ignore these things as a system, and they hurt us.  It is no ONE person’s responsibility to respond to these things, but it is everyone’s responsibility.  I can promise that nearly every time you feel a little funny and don’t speak up, someone else wishes they were brave enough to speak up, too, but don’t, because they think the community approves of the behavior because no one else spoke up. 
5. Often, when the system has been used to letting these things slide for a long time, it can be really, really scary to learn to speak up. 
6. Peter was afraid on the boat today, too. (Matthew 14:22-33).  Gotta be scared all together, name it for what it is, and learn to speak up all together.
7. If you notice that you are feeling one of those feelings above, you might ask someone close to you to grab your hand, and then you can speak up.  Here are some choices:
   1. “I felt funny when you said that, I don’t know if that was ok.”
   2. “Please do not speak to people that way.”
   3. I just heard you say that you think this other person is less valuable than you, is that what you meant?
   4. I wonder how this other person felt when you said that? 
   5. It seems that you need some attention here, can you try saying that more nicely or what you might really mean?
   6. I read in the Bible that we are supposed to build each other up as the Body of Christ.  I wonder if you thought your statement built someone up?
8. Please also read the linked article about the kinds of things that can happen when people start to stand up to bullies.  Let Pastor Jess know if you’d like a paper copy, and if you want Large Print.   http://mindbodyintegrativecounseling.com/tag/bully-retaliates/
9. This is an important piece of our system change at Calvary.  It will hurt.  It will be hard.  People might leave over it because they like things the way they are.  However, we also must ask how many people have left before because of feeling unsafe or like things were not quite right in the ways we interact?  I’m new, I don’t know, but I think we need to be asking the question as I’ve read and learned more about bullying in schools and churches as school is starting and there’s a lot being put out about it. 
10. Come and talk to me if you need/want to or are struggling with this. 
11. It’ll be hard, messy, and we’ll likely not be very good at it for a while.  Let’s work at it together as the body of Christ, hold each other accountable, and try to pay attention to the larger and often unstated things and feelings and bring them into the open.
12. Thanks for being in ministry with me and for us doing this work for God all together!

 

What's below is my August newsletter article to my congregation.  I'm really curious to see how the conversation goes since I've only been here a couple of months.  What do you think?  Is this a message your congregation needs to hear?  I'm sharing in case others have need of another person far away saying the hard things and asking the hard questions.  

Hey, ya’ll.  Pastor Jess here.  First, let me say how happy I am to be here and to be your pastor.  I love it here, and I so appreciate the honest conversations people are having with me.  I’d like to share some of those things now, and then invite you to reflect with me.  Also, this is  a huge invitation to make time to stay for fellowship hour after church on Sundays.  Lots of important conversations about the future of the church are being had, sometimes in response to the sermons, so please make time to stay and chat with us.  The community best discerns (prays, thinks, talks, seeks the will of God) when every voice is heard.  I want your voice and input on our renewal efforts. 
I’ll be honest, since we’re trying to create a culture of honesty.  Part of why we have our covenant is because I have experienced, as have many of my friends, churches who say they want to change and grow, but are unwilling to actually do it.  What they mean is that they want people to come because we invited them with flyers or parties, and to be just like us.  To worship like us, to think about the Bible like us, to be with us doing it our way.  In this congregation, we seem to be comfortable facing the reality, as hard as it is, and as much as it might hurt us, that the old way of being church just doesn’t work.  It seems that Calvary is at a point of knowing that we must do something in a radically different way than we’ve ever done it before.  We will do it together, and with God as our guide.  If our model for discipleship is Jesus, then we have all we need to radically change things, because that is what Jesus did, for the whole world.
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It seems that we are willing to focus on the mission of proclaiming God’s love and blessings to the world through our congregation, even if it means things won’t be our way anymore.  If this seems wrong to you, please let me know.  I’m writing to you today to test what I think I’m hearing and understanding.  You’ll have to let me know if I got it right, kind of close, or wrong. 

I’m wondering if we might like to try adding a mission community to our congregation.  This mission community would be supported by everyone who is already here, and everyone would have a role in supporting it.  Your role might be to make food for it.  It might be to carry around flyers and invite everyone you meet – at the gas station, grocery store, library.  Giving them out wherever you are.  It might be simply not complaining about things being different, the church being fuller and therefore messier, and the ways that forming honest and mutual relationships with new people change us.  Are you willing to invite those from the mission community to share meals with you?  Are you willing to get to know any children who come, and spend time with them outside of church?  Even if you don’t like, understand, or get the ways the mission community does things, are you willing to financially, emotionally, and spiritually support it as the mission of Calvary?  Will you come sometimes to events the mission community holds, and invite them to come to your events, too?  Would you rather the church be the way you like it, understand it, and it has always been, but maybe close in a few years, or open, but different?  Different congregations make different choices. 

If we really believe in our Christian story of death and resurrection, then closing is a faithful choice.  Because we’re able to trust that Jesus, through the church, can use the resources to bring New Life somewhere else.  It is better to let things go than to hold onto them until we hurt ourselves and others. It is a radical choice to close and trust that Jesus will find a way to bring each person and the resources of the congregation New Life. 

We can also decide that our faithful choice is to be radical in our proclamation of the Gospel while open. If we want to do this, as I believe we have the desire and attitude to do, here is what I don’t know: Do we have the energy?  Do we have the capacity?  Is each person here willing to find their role in forming and supporting the addition of a new community?  Is there room for adding something new, and focusing our energy there, while staying grounded in our traditions, our Lutheran heritage, and Sunday Morning worship?   With the formation of a new community attached to our congregation, Sunday morning worship would change very little.  There would be a solid base from which to live out your faith and the proclamation of the Gospel.  Are you ready?  How will you help?

Please let me know.  Like I said, I’m testing the ideas to see what works and what people think.  Also, many of the things I’ve written here I’ve been saying to people at fellowship hour, and I don’t want anyone to feel left out of the conversation.  Your voice matters.  Your support matters.  If most of the people here are willing to name one or two ways they would be willing to support a new mission community, we may have the energy to make it happen.  It might be too soon for this conversation for some of us, but some of us are already having it, and every voice matters.  Share your thoughts with me and let me know! 
Love,  Pr. Jess

Second Lesson Every Sunday from July 16 to August 20

Part 1 of our congregational renewal was praying every day.  Part 2 is Bible study.  By reading the same Bible passage each week, we can fully engage the story and discern together what God might be teaching our congregation. We handed out notepaper and people put in the offering plate, or they e-mailed me answers. Questions were published in the bulletin and read out loud.  

Question for This Week: *

Mark 4:35-41, Jesus Stills a Storm
35 On that day, when evening had come, he said to them, “Let us go across to the other side.” 36 And leaving the crowd behind, they took him with them in the boat, just as he was. Other boats were with him. 37 A great windstorm arose, and the waves beat into the boat, so that the boat was already being swamped. 38 But he was in the stern, asleep on the cushion; and they woke him up and said to him, “Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?” 39 He woke up and rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, “Peace! Be still!” Then the wind ceased, and there was a dead calm. 40 He said to them, “Why are you afraid? Have you still no faith?” 41 And they were filled with great awe and said to one another, “Who then is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?”

Week 1: July 16:  Which word or phrase from this story stands out to you the most?
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Week 2: July 23: What part of the story are you most like, or, what part do you identify with the most?  Are you most like a storm, the boat, Jesus, the other boats, the crowd left behind, the wind, the waves, the cushion, the calm?  Why?

Week 3: July 20:  For the part that you named last week, what are the drawbacks and gifts of being like that thing?

Week 4: August 6:  What are the storms around Calvary? Where do we most need Jesus to bring us calm?

Week 5: August 13:  Based on the part of the story you are most like, what gifts do you bring to share Jesus and calm the storms?  Do you create or participate in the storms?  How?  What learning, resources, conversations might you need to be part of calming the storms?  

Week 6: August 20:  What gives you the most hope in this Bible story? 

First, credit where credit is due.  This training was hosted by the Metropolitan Chicago Synod of the ELCA, and the presenters were from Partners for Sacred Places.  

I learned several good and helpful things from the awesome presenters, Gianfranco Grande and Emily Sajdak.  Emily puts together a mean power point, and I was grateful for all her work.  Gianfranco is a dynamic presenter, and I'm hopeful that there is much I can learn from him, and ways that I can grow in my understandings of the best ways a church can be used for the mission of God -- sharing love with the world.  

The best thing I learned was this, which is a new way of thinking for many.  

I was thinking so hard during the training, I live tweeted it.  This training was very worth my time, and I came away with many ideas.  I learned new language to communicate with others a new way of thinking about who we are and what we do as church, and how our buildings matter to the places the reside.  Our buildings, and how we steward them, matter to God.  If we primary encounter God through people, and if we serve Jesus by offering clothing, drinks of water, food, and visits of prisoners (Matthew 25: 31-46), how does that change the ways we use our buildings?